i didn’t build this to be understood.
i built this because everything else felt like a fucking lie.
they told me to be productive.
they told me to manifest.
they told me to smile through it.
but no one asked if i even wanted to be here.
i don’t even know what the fuck i’m doing anymore.
so? i just opened vscode at 2AM.
let down was playing on repeat.
and this page was born.
my speaker’s broken, but somehow still louder than my thoughts.
this isn’t art. or healing.
just what happens when silence turns into a scream.
no college, no fancy title.
just a guy trying to learn design, coding, music, making 3DCG, even tried painting jokowi’s face but somehow his eyes merged into one and stared back at me.
nothing worked.
i’ve tried everything but nothing sticks.
every time i think i've made progress, life whispers “nah, try again bitch.”
10 tabs open. 10 ideas waiting. no clue what i’m even doing here.
maybe this site is just “self-expression”
i’ll delete on my next breakdown.
if you’re still here maybe you’re lost too.
maybe you’re just tired of pretending.
whatever the reason : thanks.
in a world this fake, presence is a miracle.
i’m Pedro. or something like that.
not a president. not a brand (some expensive shit stuff).
I'm just a guy trying to be better lol.
this page is proof i existed, even if for one weird night at 2AM.
why HTML?
because i was too lazy to make it complicated.
i don’t need 12 libraries and 4 npm installs just to say “i’m not okay.”
turns out, even this dumb shit can be read like it matters.
damn. either you’re really bored.
or maybe you just needed it more than you thought.
either way — you’re here.
feel free to close the tab.
or don’t.
nothing changes either way.
but hey... for a brief moment, we connected.
and in this hyper curated world, that’s rare as fuck.
you reached the end.
most people tapped out. you didn’t.
i don’t know if that’s resilience or trauma, but thanks.
C:\Users\Pedro> disconnect.exe.